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Showing posts with label perasaanku. Show all posts
Showing posts with label perasaanku. Show all posts

Wednesday, 24 October 2012

i m so very outdated

had a meeting with a consultant yesterday and the British lad had set a meeting place in "the dome" at the fountain KLCC.
upon arrival I  had few minutes to spare so i thought it would be excellent to freshen up before the meeting.
in my haste i end up in a "premium toilet" which to me looks just about the same as any other toilet.
the only difference i noticed was as i was just about to step out of the cubicle, right after flushing, eagerly stomped a bouncer-like janitor with a laser-pointed eyes, almost knocked me off my feet armed with a mob to make sure the floor was not slippery wet.
the other premium feature of the toilet was this....
a receipt and a piece of tissue paper
i am certain now for sure! KLCC is not a hang-out place for middle-class people like me!

Wednesday, 25 July 2012

sacred means ramadhan

looking up in wikipedia sacred : considered worthy of spiritual respect or devotion; or inspiring awe or reverence among believers in a given set of spiritual ...
to me personally it means total devotion to Allah body and soul.
Ramadhan tantamount to cleansing of  your soul and physical, getting rid of what is evil and bad and adopt the more pure and holistic way of life.
i don't have to labour into what fasting does to your whole digestive system and the condition that you have to feel but fasting does not allow you to be sloppy, undone and smelly.
don't you know that if you stand in front of your creator you must look and smell excellent, much more than when you go dating for the first time?
by that i mean fasting Muslims must take good care of their bodily odour specially the mouth.
forgive my alter ego Allah my lord! because you said the smell of a mouth of a fasting man is far better than kasturi (the perfume) to you, but truly i almost fainted to the highest degree last nite during the sunnat prayer of tarawikh when a person next to me fail to brush his teeth and emit the foul smell that sent you to "jamban-like ambiance" (toilet) every rakaat you pray.
just think of that!
there are 20 rakaat of tarawikh and 3 witirs. i felt like pulling each and everyone of his bad teeth out with a pair of pliers plus the good ones too! that! is for being selfish with no whatsoever respect to others than oneself.
Astagfirullah....clense your soul (my heart is telling my mind)
but forgive me my lord for feeling the way i felt!

Sunday, 27 May 2012

Hari Belia 2 juta di Putrajaya

and...all these for what?
i wonder how much money goes down the drain and in the end how do you measure the success of the assembly? who keep the tab on the taxpayers money sponsoring the event? What is it worth to the country?

as we packed ourselves in my little toby (the name of my cute suzuki vitara sports) anticipated the terrible traffic jam and the unavailablibility of parking space, the hari belia has done us real injustice.

all we wanted to do was to attend a ceramah by Ustaz Adzmy Sulaiman on saturday at the putrajaya mosque. True enough the horrible traffic jam started at the big putrajaya round-about leading to the dataran via the pm's office.
as we were approaching the feeder road to the dataran, my fear came true. it was blocked!  no one was allowed to go to the dataran.  wanita comel pleaded to be given an examption since this is a religious commitment but alas, it fall on deaf ears of the traffic policemen. they would not budge. so we missed the magrib  jemaah prayer and had to do it on our own. the ceramah were about to begin.
i almost came to tears discovering that there were only about 15 people listening to the sermon and half of them were the mosque personnel. ustaz Adzmy is one of the outstanding ustaz that was able to make you get in touch with your inner core and move you to tears with repentence when leading the qiammulail.

as always, needless to say how excellent ustaz Adzmy delivered his ceramah on sirah, nevertheless, he still lost to the concerts and entertainment programs right outside at the dataran.
the isyak jemaah prayer came and the reality showed it's ugly face. where have all the 2 million muslim belia gone to? hardly a sauf full.  just take 200 belia that perform the prayer over the 2 million assembly members, it it like the 20000% belia that do not perform their prayers. Syukuralhamdulillah, my 3 sons were with me.

it's a scary thought and almost all of them are melayu whose islamic birthrights were by virtue of default.
camna nanti nak berdiri di depat ALLAH dan jawab  yang you are the cause of the the program that's "laqa" that pulls jemaah away from their duty to their creater. serius!
dan aku pun teringat aksi burung pipit yang sibuk terbang berulang alik membawa air di dalam paruhnya yang amat kecil itu lalu cuba memadam api yang membakar nabi Ibrahim. bila di cemuh oleh burung lain maka si pipit berkata, "sekurang-kurangnya aku telah berusaha sedaya-upaya yang aku mampu dengan kudrat yang Allah berikan pada ku untuk membantu nabi Allah Ibrahim. apa pula alasan yang akan kamu semua berikan kepada tuhan nanti?"

akupun menjadi insaf.

inilah realitinya

sesungguhnya siksaan Allah itu kepada mereka yang engkar adalah amat perit dan pedih. ya Allah, selamatkanlah aku dari siksaan mu kerana perkara-perkara yang laqa di hari pembalasan nanti.

p.s. wanita comel is my beautiful wife.

Tuesday, 15 May 2012

tenang

alhamdulillah!
kurasakan dunia ini setenang air di tasek bera

Thursday, 1 March 2012

blurrrrrr

Pernah tak bangun dari tidur dan tetiba rasa macam minda terswitch-off
Another word = blur
Ada ker cari pintu bilik mandi tak jumpa terbuka pintu almari baju. Apa ke jadah nak mandi dalam closet. Ntah haper-haper driving, sedar-sedar tersalah jalan plak  dahla aku lewat pagi ni.
Apahal la palang tol tak bukak-bukak. Alamak bila aku tengok betul-betul, kad access pejabat tu yang aku guna untuk touch and go. maluuuuuu
Setengah jam aku duduk kat meja merenung ke dinding, tak tahu haper nak buat, walhal aku  banyak kerja di pejabat hari ni.
Nyet…nyet… nyet…. “boss nak minta cuti segera, bleh?”
“haper! tak boleh boss? Oh ya laporan tu belum siap lagi”
“baiklah saya tak jadi cuti boss!”
Siot la engko pena!

Thursday, 23 February 2012

nazir

Pagi tadi tengah aku asyik bagi lecture bagaimana nak jadi duta kepada organisasi, tetiba Pengarah Akademi masuk duduk di belakang.
Terus aku jadi sesak nafas, perut memulas hangin satu badan – rasa nak pengsan. Nasib baik tak kena heart attack.
Bukan aku tak biasa dengan dia, tapi bila dia datang untuk tujuan naziran, feeling jadi tak menentu, tak keruan.
Huh gelak le korang! Tak kena tak pe. Nanti kena naziran baru tahu camna!
Nasib baik score keseluruhan on lecturer 97.70%, kalau tidak jenuh aku nak explain kenapa tetiba aku jadi batang kayu – kaku.

Wednesday, 25 January 2012

mimpi + illusi = realiti

melakar mimpi adalah pengalaman yang cukup indah
menzahirkan sebuah ilusi menjadi realiti amat menggetarkan.

kata si hawa,
debarannya bak menunggu kelahiran bayi.
saat ini, itulah yang aku rasai.

nasib baik tak payah jadi pompuan untuk dapat itu rasa.
lega!

Friday, 6 January 2012

suffocated

life is what u make out if it. it is a choice, your choice - no one force it upon you. true! there are times someone says " i am a victim of circumstances" it is written in azali and so it has become a fate for you but what matters is what do you do to come out of it.
having said that, there are people who like to meddle into the private affairs of others- you know the so-called busy bodies. they thought they know you better than yourself. their hapiness are when they think they could have an influence over what you do,  possibbly take over your life, own you.
they are always there, they are everywhere, all over. there is no more room for privacy - your only very own sanity!
listen!
i only wanted to be a friend, nothing more, nothing less.
please let me have some room to breath - i am suffocating real bad around you,
please oh please just let me be who i am and not what you wanted me to be.

Saturday, 12 November 2011

truly

damn! damn! damn!
i was hoping that
it wouldn't come to this.

but the truth is
i missed my old life.
only god knows
but
i have to move on
even if you take my breath away
and left me here
high and dry
to die

i will pick up the leftovers
and slowly raise from the ground
and stand tall
so tall
even you wouldn't recognise
who i am

someone
you once touched and torned

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